The coffee shop, my happy place, just opened in our small town and I am delighted! The temperature outside is a balmy -12 degrees. Did I dress warm enough for this day? No. I'm debating how many times is appropriate to ask for a "warmer upper" from the barista. Every time the door opens I am reminded of my irresponsible decisions this morning as a Wisconsonite. ANYWAYS…the door just opened and along with the arctic breeze came a cool dude, a smiling face which brightened as we made eye contact. Tyler. My face and my heart smiled. He was a reminder of the person I used to be.
I used to be a boss.
I used to spend my days "bossing" people around. (in the nicest way possible)
I used to have people who looked to me to keep the chaos controlled.
I used to get up, go to work, and sat in a gorgeous office (with a view and a door).
It felt good. It felt natural. I felt confident.
Tyler was a "kid" I hired for my sales team. I don't mean that disrespectfully, he was just like a shiny new penny, and was excited to start his career. I'm a hugger, and he was one of those people that you just feel like hugging all the time, a kind soul. (Dear HR, I did not make my staff hug me.) He was respectful of me as his leader and teacher, although, often times I found myself learning from him as well. The kind of working relationship that every team leader looks for in their team. Tyler wasn't the only one. I had a full team of amazing people that I loved spending those 40+ hours with each week.
While I loved that part of my life, seeing Tyler today, not as his manager, but just as a person, a fellow human, a friend, was so incredibly rewarding. It was a gift from God to be in that very short 2 minute small-talk conversation. I wasn't a cancer mom in that moment, I was just "Anna".
I don't like when people use the phrase, "in a previous life I ______…".
I LOVE the way God has shaped my life as a whole. Every change of direction, whether chosen or forced, has made me, "Anna".
Friend, take heart and be encouraged, that even when the circumstances of our life are difficult, God, the masterful potter, is continuing to shape you into something so beautiful. Trust in that, even when it feels hopeless. You may think that you have screwed everything up, or that what has happened is irreparable, YOU ARE NOT THAT POWERFUL. You belong to Him first, and He is only Good.
My prayer for you today, is that you see His Hand in where you have been, and that you hold tight to it as you move forward.
Proverbs 16:9 "We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps."
Psalm 139:5-7 "You go before me and follow me. You place your hand of blessing on my head. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too great for me to understand! I can never escape from your Spirit!"
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